Thursday, February 5, 2015

The Year Of The How

It is already the second month of 2015. We are 36 days in, one-tenth of the year locked and loaded already. How many more bullets of success can I add to this revolver I'm staring down (too much imagery?)?

Well, it is the Jesus Year..., as succinctly put by fellow "linguist" trickynek: Urban Dictionary: jesus year. And this means for me several things:
1- Learning my language and a language will be two separate goals and challenges for me. Right now, French, Portuguese and Cantonese are at the top of the list, vying for attention. My language, my rhythm of communication and particular written voice, is a far more intuitive skillset to develop. I know within myself that my Ambition sometimes gives way to the slightly crazy cousin, Perfectionist Paralysis, so I will strive not to shoot too high beyond my sight path.
2- Making this blog work for me.  Connect me to amazing people and ideas, earn some income, get some readership, further validate my fevered insistence that I, too am a writer (and published! Just buried in time and laziness).
3- On the continued subject of writing, I aim to jump-start my book idea, and couple this effort with my choices in travel initiatives, job and grant applications. Whether it is a volunteer abroad program or an actual paid position for 3-6 months or longer. I will not fear the prospect of perceived further poverty to make this book come alive, dammit! It need not be so, says Betsy Robinson.
4- Launching myself into the world again, on my terms, is a major goal of mine. My first instinctual destination, as I communicated to my flight attendant buddy Vanessa, is Brazil. So far, Cross-Cultural Solutions has a Salvador, Brazil travel program. Go, fundraising!!

The bottom line is, I don't want to just learn of you, World. I want to learn from you and with you.

Oh yeah, and I'm gonna learn how to shoot a gun at a firing range in North Florida next week. An incredible aside, but suffice it to say that I watched a video and got inspired to ask myself a question, and then answer it. Some funny young men on Buzzfeed decided to answer the question of whether shooting guns made them feel more manly/relevant/violent/pro-gun, etc. It was mostly them dressing up in 60's James Bond outfits and having a good time joshing each other, but it was interesting to see their transition either towards a deeper understanding of the gun-aficionados of America, or further alienated in their relating the shooting of guns to masculinity.

For me, it's not so much about testing my internal testosterone levels, but rather exploring a different concept of power and control. I faced a challenge at the end of last year, driving long-distance and at night. I almost drove off the Delaware Memorial Bridge with a stripped tire and a broken steering rod in the learning process, but I came out the other end of that adventure a more confident pedestrian driver. I hope to have a similar experience in learning to shoot a gun at a firing range. It's out of my element, but still manages to speak to a small part of myself that would like to explore and understand the instruments of dominance in this culture I live in.

Whew! Time for bed and dreaming and world-domination plotting! Much props to Evita and Nomadness for fueling this fire within me!

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